Wednesday, April 18, 2012

M is for Music

Mood: Calm – for now
Listening to: Completely ineffective ceiling fans – it’s hot!

I am a music junkie. I’m sure I’ve mentioned this before. While my love of a certain 80’s rock band is more than well known, this goes way beyond that.

Growing up, I lived in a house that was always full of music. My mother played the piano, my father played the guitar, and they both sang. My extended family is really into music also. I took piano lessons for almost 12 years while I was growing up. My brother majored in music in college and can play more musical instruments than I know names for. So yeah, lots o music in our house. I grew up enjoying music on a superficial level. My dad was really, really into the Beatles so I listened to a lot of that. Worth noting – the musical selection in our house was almost exclusively restricted to 50’s and 60’s music and Christian music. I definitely did not grow up with tons of variety. I understand why my parents did this – it was to shelter my brother and me a bit.

As I grew older and developed my own mind, I started stretching my boundaries in regards to music. To this day, I still find music that I cannot believe I didn’t know about all this time.  I have a better appreciation for both playing the piano and understanding music because of my background.

Certain people are susceptible to music. I am one of them. It’s like a cancer (without the negative connotation) that moves into your soul and changes you.  It touches you on a fundamental level that you will never be able to get away from. Once it’s happened, you want it to happen again. Music for people like me has a way of sneaking in and getting a hold of your emotions. Due to my rhino skin abilities, music gives me a very solid outlet for my emotions. Music has the ability to grab me by the ear and cheer me up, depress me, or generally give me something to cling on to when life starts getting rough. This is the reason I’m so ridiculously attached to Guns n Roses. This were hard when I started getting into the music. Life quickly took a rapid downward spiral and I do believe that the music is what kept me sane in such a dark time.

I crave music like some people crave religion. I really can’t explain it too well, I just need it. I need the soaring powerful feeling I get when I’m singing, the dark contemplation, the mindless noise and energy, the quiet soul and the occasional cheerful simplicity that music can bring. Singing and playing the piano are like going to church for me. I go and visit a forgotten place inside of me and take care of myself, even if it’s very briefly. Sometimes it’s hard, sometimes it’s painful, sometimes it is pure joy, but I always feel better afterwards.

Life is hard and occasionally very complicated. Music reflects that. Some get into art, some get into religion, some drinking. They are all complex and occasionally difficult. 

Right now, I’m really into Velvet Revolver (really, I’m going to chuck something at anyone that is surprised by this) and Buckcherry.  What can I say? I’m a sucker for men who have haunting voices who sing about deep stuff.


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