Mood: Calm – for now
Listening to: Completely ineffective ceiling fans – it’s hot!
All right, all right calm down perverts. The panties that I’m referring to are of the big girl variety. Shucks. That probably didn’t help. Let’s get specific. I’m talking about the phrase “Put your big girl panties on and deal with it.”
I was whining about how hard it is to raise kids to a friend recently when she replied with this gem. Now I know she had the best intentions and was trying to be humorous, but it made me wonder. Do I complain too much? My husband very well may say yes, but only because he has the privilege of listening to me complain whenever I need to. Usually he’s smarter than to admit it to me when I ask.
I get it. People don’t like listening to complaining. I hate listening to chronic whiners too. I’m generally a big fan of the “suck it up and deal with it” philosophy. Life is hard. Get on with it.
On the other hand, sometimes people just need to vent. Life is frustrating. Even if you have a plan on how to proceed and don’t plan to sit around and whine forever, it helps to get a little of the steam off, especially if it’s a really stressful issue.
Commiserating with someone else about something can bond you together (My goodness our boss is a prick!) or it can put space between you (Um, no, I really think the boss was right on this one). I think everyone knows that life isn’t simple. It usually isn’t as easy as just facing a situation head on. Sometimes, you need to be comfortable letting off a little steam with another person rather than just worrying that you’ll be inconveniencing them by making them listen to some whining. I can almost guarantee that unless you whine all the time, you’ll get an ear and possibly some semi-supportive comments.
So think twice before you tell someone to suck it up and get on with it.
By the way: I'm part of the camp that hates the word panties. It just sounds so dirty.